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Comments

ks

I think different people have different thresholds for things like this. It's not necessarily mommy related either. In the group of people that I lunch with most days, one woman always has 2 cents to add, no matter the topic. Honestly, I don't even notice it as outside the normal give and take of conversation, but at least 2 others in the group pick up on it and notice it, including contradictions among the various stories she tells. It certainly makes me paranoid about what I say, knowing that they see her this way. So, I don't have any advice, except that being conscious of it is probably a huge part of avoiding the mommy-know-it-all pit.

JenniferW

I HATE mommy know it alls! I usually miss the snobbery, b/c I'm dense like that, but occasionally it gets through. I try not to do it, but I'm sure I do.

The MOST annoying assvise was my own mother. She was telling my female cousin that colic was due to intestinal difficulties and the baby can't pass gas, blah blah. Now for one, the girl doesn't have kids, and my mom hasn't had a baby in like...30 years. Nor is she a doctor. So how SHE knows what colic is caused by, and doctors don't...is amazing. When I tried to gently mention that she might be incorrect, she plowed over me and kept insisting that she was right. I mean, who cares that I just had a baby 10 months ago and just MAY have read up on it???

Jessica

Hah! My best friend reads your blog, and she linked me here because I just posted about Mommie Know-It-Alls in my own blog the other day: http://jessicaem.livejournal.com/167920.html

Except my experience is as a mother-to-be, and my ire is raised by Internet Mommie Know-It-Alls. How do I deal with it? I guess by pretending to ignore it. And then blogging about it.

Glad I'm not the only one who noticed this!

isabel

Try smiling in a smug way and saying, "every situation is different". And maybe titter.

Okay, that's my passive agressive way of dealing with it. But just saying those words without the snark should defuse some of the situation, I hope.

Meggan

I try never to give advice (though I probably sometimes wind up doing it anyway). I approach it by saying "my favorite thing was" or "what worked best for us was".

But Aliza, I would really love to get some advice from you!! I have a 5 month old and I am dreading starting solids. I was really interested to read a month or so ago about all the yummy organic foods that NG enjoys. I went back to your post last week and then tried to do some online research about naturopathic foods for babies, with not much luck. Any advice you could give or resources you could point me to?

Thanks!

aliza

Meggan - I'll try to post this week with the entire food list that I am following. I'm not being totally fanatical about it (other than avoiding wheat and sugar entirely) because I've introduced some 9 month foods right now (carrots today). NG is LOVING all of it so far. Yay!

Em

I hate mommy-know-it-alls and also find myself fighting the urge to offer advice to newer mums. Assvice...for me it was being told by someone to read the Gina Ford book, which is not really my thing. I think it's the Contented Baby Book or something. I get freaked by people who are too, too rigid with their baby's schedule.

Anne

I was plugging "miscarriage" into my blog site and found yours. I just wanted to say thank you. I've read about all of the pregnancies and miscarriages and you make me smile. Quite unlike a lot of the other material I've found. I'm still trying to figure out ways to grieve my miscarriage and anything that has a positive outlook helps. Thank you, I'll keep reading. Anne*

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