T-Shirt: I Survived an HSG

So I lived. I really work myself up and my
imagination goes haywire anticipating these
invasive surgical things. But then, I survive
and wonder what all the fuss was about.
Oh that's right, I was the only one making
the fuss.

I took the light painkiller (aspirin deritive,
not a morphine drip, mind you) an hour
before the procedure. And here's a blow
by blow for anyone who is curious.

First, undressed from the waist down.
Nothing unusual. The stirrups, however,
were not the put-your-feet-in-these
contraptions but were the lay-your-
leg-over-them kind. Just felt odd but
nothing too scary.

Then the speculum. Gotta love it when they
warm it up instead of inserting a cold device.

Then a spray (spritz?) of numbing stuff
which begins to get warm, almost a burning
sensation like a bad yeast infection.

Then they insert the DEVICE. The doctor
commented that the DEVICE looks more
intimidating than it is painful.

"I don't want to look at it," I said.

"You don't have to," he assured me.

They also turned the TV monitor so that
both G. and I could watch. Oh yes, they
let G. in the room during the procedure.
I asked them to watch him to make sure
he did not faint.

The insertion of the device was negligible.

Then the squirting of the dye began.

I have to say, the two medical assistants -
women - who were in the room with us
were amazing, incredible and wonderful
all rolled into one.

As the dye was squirted, the cramping began.
At first it was just like a period, then like
a bad period, then like a Period from the
Depths of Hell. Then, I swear, it had to be
what labor contractions were like - not like
anything I had experienced before.

The women held my hands and stroked
my arms, talking me through the whole
thing. I want them there when I give birth
one day.

Then it was over and the cramping immediately
subsided. Must have been less than 5 minutes.

"I sure hope labor pains don't last any
longer than this!" I joked. I was joking the
whole time, trying to put on that game face
and convince myself that I was talking a
walk in the park.

And it actually was almost that easy, give
or take a major cramp or two.

Afterward, the doctor showed me each
Xray picture they took and how the
dye entered my uterus immediately but
didn't enter my right tubes very quickly.
The left tubes held up like champs while
the right tubes slowly filled.

He said it was textbook and everything looked
normal so far.

I'll know more in a few weeks once blood
tests are in and all tests are compared.

And that, my dear blog friends, was an HSG.

Comments

[Lori]

Great news on the HSG results! I had one done 4 1/2 years ago - it was normal. I remember the intense cramping, like my worst cramps (I have endometriosis) and what I felt with miscarriage . There's a "myth" that your odds of conceiving are better for the next few cycles following an HSG. I hope it's true for you!

[OliviaDrab]

Congratulations on the HSG results! I had one last year and it wasn't the most pleasant ordeal I have ever endured that's for sure. I am glad your tubes look good!!

Good luck with the blood results.

[Sherry]

Thanks for the blow-by-blow...I'm up for an HSG in a few weeks and am pretty nervous about it. It doesn't sound so bad...

Thanks and good luck!

[Kristine]

Permission to brag about my apparently high pain tolerance? I hardly felt a thing with my HSG. And when I had my uterine biopsy (with no medication) my doctor told me perhaps I should be an international spy, because I didn't even flinch!
But I fall asleep in the dentist chair.
Okay, before I have you all thinking I'm superwoman I better tell the truth- labor hurts like a motherfucker!