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Babyfruit Poems


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I am currently working on an infertility/miscarriage altered book. The only other ceremony is crying into my pillow at night when no one is listening.
XO, isabel


I have a fireplace in my apartment. I put a picture of my husband and I at our wedding, another of us as kids, the baby booties my mother in law gave to me, a rose, and a candle all next to each other. I have only lit the candle once, but I said a small prayer. I have also been thinking about drawing a picture with the name Gracie on it in bubble letters, because that is what I named my baby.

Jaime Malcolm

My mother died 9 years ago but we only just spread her ashes off the coast of a small island in British Columbia. We did this on my birthday; it was a place my family went in the summers. Shortly after we spread the ashes I got pregnant for the first time. I had a missed misscarriage 10 weeks later and had a D&C. My husband and I went back to the island after the procedure to recover and stay in a cabin. When we had spread my mother's ashes, we each took a white oyster shell, not really as a keepsake but in more of an absentminded beachcombing way. When we went back to the place where my mother's ashes had been released, we brought one of the shells with us. We laid it by a shard from the ceramic urn that housed my mothers ashes (the tide had not yet buried it or carried it away). After we did that we set about 12 flowers into the ocean from the bouquets our family had given us upon hearing of the loss of our baby to be. We stood in the fog holding hands and said goodbye to our little blueberry (as we had nicknamed her). It was sad, but I like to think of those beautiful flowers slowly drifting out to sea and the oyster shell nestled among the rocks where we finally said goodbye to mother. Maybe she will take care of that little soul until it decides the time is right to come back to us.

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