Well, in case you missed it - here's your
Bachelorette update.
Jen had a lot of duds and dorks to choose from.
And she picked 'em, let me tell you.
There's Shrek, who is a nice guy but huge, gigantor-esque.
There's Stu the Stalker - totally psycho little gnome.
There's Pretty Boy - who has all the smooth moves and she
is falling for him already.
There's a nice looking Black Man who we know is
the Token Minority so not much more to say there.
There are 2 virgins - count them - 2 Virgins - ages
27 and 28. Not related. The first has freaky
cartoon character slick hair - like a Virginal Richie Rich.
The other is actually quite handsome and smart -
We'll call him Virgin Motivational Speaker from Texas.
There's a firefighter from Staten Island but he's
no Ryan.
And Ben, the Pinheaded Ski Instructor from Aspen.
His head is so small, it is a miracle he's alive.
And A.W. the Bug Eyed Wonder. Totally freaked
me out just looking at him. How can she NOT notice?
And Freaky Frenchman - what was that - a tear I saw
trickling down your face in the previews for the
upcoming episodes? Sacred Bleu!
And there's the First Impression rose receiver (given
by Jen's friends, not by her). He's Blue Collar Welder-man!
Anyone I've forgotten was, well, forgettable.
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